The Best Excuses for Missing Work
22 items ranked
Are you in desperate need of a day off but have no legitimate excuse? Then take a look, because you just may find something here to help you. From 'most effective' to 'sounds good but will probably get you in trouble' these excuses may be just what you're looking for!
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1.
My Child is Sick
Always the best reason - for while an employer can question whether YOU were really sick or not, it is considered impolite to question the validity of a sick child claim. Of course - you may want to make sure you HAVE children before using this excuse.
71 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
2.
I'm sick
A specific symptom, such as a high fever or rash or some such is best added to this excuse. If you can SOUND sick, it is a bonus.
69 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
3.
I had a car accident on the way to work
This one is guaranteed to garner you sympathy, especially if you moan about the price of towing, or the cost of geting the dent out of your door.
49 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
4.
There’s been a death in the family
Another automatic sympathy generator - but it can get complicated if you have to repeat the story later and get the details wrong.
46 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
5.
My asthma/lupus/arthritis is really acting up today
Sometimes better than the sick excuse - this one involves quality of life - you COULD come in, but you'd be miserable. This one makes the employer feel slightly guilty even though they are not sure what they are guilty FOR.
46 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
6.
The brakes/fanbelt went out on my car and I’m at the auto shop waiting for it to get fixed.
This is a great excuse because of the notoriously bad reputation most auto shops have regarding wait times for walk-in cusotmers.
39 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
7.
I locked my keys in my car and I’m waiting for AAA to show up.
Not as good as an accident - or a broken fanbelt, but everyone knows how long AAA can take, so if you don't show up it won't be wondered at.
35 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
8.
My babysitter is sick and I have no one else to watch my kids.
This one is right up there with sick children. What employer is going to complain? After all, it's not like you can leave them alone.
33 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
9.
My pet died in the night.
This is a tear jerker, and will get you a lot of sympathy.
27 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
10.
My wife (husband) is too sick to get out of bed and I have to stay home and take care of them.
Not as good as a sick child, but if you make the spouse ill enough it can work.
26 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
11.
My psychiatrist put me on a new anti-depressant yesterday and now I’m feeling odd.
You'll get an automatic "hope you feel better" from your boss. After all - they don't want you have a reaction to your medication and going postal...
25 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
12.
I My Cat/Dog/Goldfish/Guinea Pig is sick/hurt and has to be taken to the vet.
Make sure that you list them as being sick/hurt, because just a vet appointment isn't enough of an excuse in the eyes of most employers.
24 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
13.
I have a doctor’s appointment
Lame. Why couldn't you have scheduled it on a day off? Whatever you do, don't make it for a routine appointment. If you can make the appointment for a specialist who only had this day/time available, then all the better!
15 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
14.
I have a dentist appointment
Even lamer. Unless you chipped a tooth or lost a crown or something equally horrific.
12 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
15.
I threw my back out bowling/biking/hang gliding last night
12 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
16.
My water has been turned off so I can’t take a shower or even brush my teeth.
Who is going to argue with this? Of course, if you're going up for a promotion it could indicate a lack of planning or management skills on your part.
10 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
17.
I’m in the hospital
You'll probably be asked to provide details - so have a good story standing by.
9 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
18.
I’m still drunk from last night
Use with care - this one requires the right kind of boss, or a devil-may-care attitude.
8 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
19.
I have to fetch my relatives from the airport
Effective for all types of employees (single, married, with kids, without kids, works especially if you want to extend your holiday vacation being paid half of the day) (^___^)
5 points - added 11 years ago by guest -
20.
I spent my check on lottery tickets and I’m out of gas until payday.
Again - not one to use if you're coming up on a promotion or performance review.
4 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
21.
The voices in my head told me not to come into work today
Fair warning - there's a good chance that when this one is used the voice on the phone will tell you not to bother coming in again. But if you don't care - go for it :)
3 points - added 14 years ago by thewordwarrior -
22.
I fell & can' t get up
If you fell, you might be temporarily parlized for that day.
1 point - added 9 years ago by guest -
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